Wednesday, September 30, 2009


If it were my health reform plan, I'd totally make deep tissue massage a covered medical expense. Preventative medicine, baby.

Monday, September 28, 2009


On good sportsmanship:
"Okay, we're going to see who runs faster. We both start at this line...but this is not a race, it is just to see who runs faster. Now on your mark, get ready, set, go! I'm gonna beat you!

On finding good help these days:
"Mama, did you just break the pony holder?" *insert eye roll and sigh* "You're fired."

Friday, September 25, 2009

How to charm me

Tell me I'm beautiful just as I'm falling asleep at night.

Friday, September 18, 2009

How to annoy me

Tell me my shoes are a little bit Betty Boop. Well your shoes are a little bit orthopedic.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

So this is love

Ben and I have been married for almost 10 months now. Like never before I feel utmost confidence in his love for me. Often when people have been together for awhile the compliments start to fall on deaf ears. I'm not sure if there is a name for this unfortunate syndrome but I know I've fallen prey to it in the past. I suppose it is similar to the way a teenage girl decides her mother has to think she's beautiful because that's what mother's do.

Last night Ben and I were watching what Not to Wear together. Now I don't want to mislead anyone here. I don't have to force Ben to watch this show, but neither is it his favorite form of televised entertainment. During the make-up segment when Carmindy was explaining how to emphasize one's favorite features, I teasingly asked Ben which of my facial features were his favorites. He answered, quite genuinely, that he liked my nose and that "from the side, it is especially cute."

Now people, I have never given a lot of thought to my nose. It is a nice enough organ but nothing I've ever spent a lot of time loving or hating. When he said that, though, my heart fluttered in my chest and down to my toes. It has been echoing in my head all day. My husband thinks I have a cute nose! Isn't that just lovely?

I have no idea why this particular compliment means so much to me. I think it must be love.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009


Acting as Emily Post:
B: Emily, it is horribly inappropriate to eat that with your fingers.
J: Yeah, baby. Please use your fork.
E. But why? I promise I'll pick them up with my fingers only when you aren't looking.

On life decisions:
That man in that truck is smoking! That will turn your lungs black, my body book says it. I hope he is happy with his decision to turn his lungs black.

On the drudgery of traffic jams:
E: Mom, why does the traffic have to be stopped both ways?!
J: I don't know, baby. I cannot control the traffic.
E: I wish you could. Then I wouldn't have to stare at the ugly old man.