Seriously?

Sunday, Jesse and Crystal dropped off Emily after what sounds like a great weekend together. That's when I noticed it. Crystal is wearing an engagement ring. Not just any engagement ring, though. Oh no. It is an exact replica of the ring Jesse gave me all those years ago. Geez. So she recently accepted a job at Bottom Line Bookkeeping (where I worked when Jesse and I got engaged and the first couple of years we were married) and she is wearing my engagement ring. Is it just me or is all this a little Stepford-esque?

Hobby

If you drink the recommended daily ounces of water your new hobby will be peeing.

I'm so damn hungry

This summer I'm enrolled in a Yoga/Health Class for my kinesiology credit. As part of the class I had to calculate my ideal weight and caloric intake and keep a food diary showing an effort to be healthy. I am supposed to consume somewhere between 1400 and 1500 calories a day.I think it is killing me- I'm so damn hungry that all I can think about is food.Right now, for instance, I am pondering a hamburger with cheese and bacon. Yesterday I could not stop thinking of quesadillas. Plus, I'm trying to drink the recommended amount of water per day. Do you know that if you drink all the water you are supposed to in a day you will gain a new hobby? You will. It is called peeing like a racehorse every hour. So far today I have had three and a half glasses and I have gone to the bathroom six times since I got up at 6:45. I do not have time for this many calls from nature. It would be different if the water were helping with the hunger but it is not. Can I seriously fail a class for refusing to give up calories? Argh!

Emily!

On the art of giving:
J: What do you want to get Freddie and B-Bob for their birthday?
E: Ummm, I think we should get them a kitten!
J: Oh Baby, you know what? We really can't get other people's kids live animals.
E: *gasp* Mama! We cannot give Freddie and B-Bob a dead kitten.
J: No! Of course not. I was thinking we would get them some toys.
E: Yeah!...Or a turtle!

On homemaking:
J: Baby, isn't this ice cream good? Did you know Aunt Donna made this from scratch? She didn't just buy it at the store.
E: Aunt Donna? Dis ice cream is good. Did you buy it or did you make it from scabbity?

Can I be a kid again?

I just got back from Virginia Beach with that boy I love. As is typical with vacations it was all over way to soon, but not for all they typical reasons. Okay, mostly just because time with Ben is always too short. Virginia Beach is otherwise not my cup of tea. This is problematic. When I graduate in May the plan was to move up there and in with Ben. But now....ewwww. Ben will be gone for six months at a time leaving Emily and I all alone in a place where we know no-one and like very little. I'm just not sure the love of one boy is enough to make that kind of change. We talked about it a little and it pretty much comes down to "we'll wait and see." Once we know his deployment schedule and the availability of jobs we'll have a better idea about what we really want. In truth though, being a grown up kind of sucks and I'd like to be a kid again.

How to annoy me

Who came up with the tag-line "Have a happy period?"

Seriously?

Who came up with the tagline "Have a happy period?"